Almost A Perfect Weekend

KF was here again this weekend.  No surprise there.  Everything was almost great until we decided to go to crazy threesome girl's house.  KF thought that after he had not talked to her for weeks and told her that she had a boyfriend and therefore couldn't say anything to him, that she got the message.  Umm, no.  I left to go get my car and she rehashed all the stuff she said to me before.  What did KF say? Nothing.  He doesn't want to mess up our threesome prospects until we find a new person.  I kinda understand, but at the same time I still don't think that it's fair.  He lets her say what she wants and act how she wants and doesn't say anything because he wants us to be able to still have threesomes with her?  

Stuff like this makes me doubt his words and actions.  I feel like his words and actions are "saying" different things.  He said that I should trust his actions.  I told him that I need actions and words.  I don't know what to do about it right now.....

Fights and the End

I always hate this point during semesters.....the point where you realize that you should probably kick into high gear if you want to make decent grades.  I hate FINALS.  Although F.I.N.A.L.S has really near always translated into Fuck. I Never Actually Learned this Shit.  The only difference this year is that I actually started strong in my classes.  One one of my first exams I actually even got a 3.0.  I was stoked!  I can count the 3.0's and above that I have gotten college on one hand.  Actually, probably on two fingers.  But at least I started off good this semester.

Bobby and I are still fighting.  I swear if I had $200 right now I would pay to have his phone turned off myself.  This is turning into a terrible fiasco and I can only blame myself for it.  It made me argue, fight, and say mean things to him yesterday.  I didn't want to, but he pulled me into it.  I completely wash my hands of him now.  He tried EVERY insult he could come up with.  He called me ugly, fat, stupid, talked about my grades, talked about me not being able to join the sorority I wanted to join, everything.  Everything I ever confided in him, he regurgitated it and put it all back in my face.  I really don't like him anymore.  I can never even picture being his friend again.

Why is it so freaking hard for me to find a flipping job!?  God must have something wonderful in store because it seems like everything is falling through.  Every time the temp. agency calls magically my phone is out of service.  wth.  I got 1 interview after about 50 applications and didn't get the job.  This is getting really old.

Me and KF are doing good.  I guess, he is coming up here this weekend. =)  <3

There are a few things I hate more than stress.  One of them is working in groups.  Another is people that cannot take care of business.  I am on a planning committee.  We plan a black graduation ceremony every year.  Why is it 5 weeks until the event and people on the committee (of about 10 ppl) are still dropping the ball on stuff??  5 weeks BEFORE the ceremony??  Then I find out the program hasn't even been started yet???  

What 

the 

heck!

Updates and Rants All in One??

Yea, I know I haven't been on here in a while.  Meh.  The internet really isn't working at home right now and KF has been up here since Friday.  Yea. I said it.  Since F-R-I-D-A-Y.  We have had a ball.  

Well, mostly we have just had tons and tons of sex.  

His cousin pointed out the fact that we have "lived" together for 1/2 the month.  Eh.  It has been okay.  Yesterday we got into a HUGE fight.  Like huge.  So big that we almost stopped talking, but we decided to work it out instead.  It was a dumb argument anyway--he got mad at something that I said as a joke.  ::rolls eyes::  He admitted that he likes me more than he admits.  He feels like I should know that he cares about me without him saying it.  I guess.  But he saod that he will work on expressing his feelings more and being more affectionate.  I am trying to tone down my huggy-kissy-expressy self. lol.  We went to church on Sunday and he met my mom.  That was interesting.  It went a lot better than I thought it would go.  But at the same time, I think she is just excited that I actually brought someone around her.

The sex has been ridiculously good this week too.

We are still not "official" and the more I think about it, it would make sense if we were.  We are exclusive and all.  I asked him what is gonna happen when I start wanting to be more and he said we'll talk about it then.  How do you do this?? lol.  Wait 'til the time is right?  When the heck is that?

Yea, so it took me like 2 hours to write this post (I'm at work) and I forgot all of the rants I wanted to talk about.

KF really hates lube.  What the hecks is up with that?  After having sex like 15 times in one week I think you may need a little lube! lol

Life Lessons

Life Lesson #1: I am MY own "best" friend.  I don't know why I keep trying to give people chances to be my "best" friend.   Let's take my current situation with KF.  I have been talking to his cousin for a while.  I would say we were friends.  Good friends.  We talk often, sometimes more than I talk to KF.  We have good convos and I talk to him about things going on with me and KF and he tells me when I am tripping.  

But today he told KF this whole story wrong and completely out of context.  

Me = annoyed.  

What did I tell his cousin?  That me and KF have been arguing since the day he left, which is true.  *sidebar*It really boggles my mind--we live together for a week and get along perfectly.  He leaves and all we do is fight?  Up until this week we had never even really argued for real.*end sidebar*  Then I asked him if he knew what was going on with him.  I also said that I did not think that it was fair that KF expects me to answer every question he asks me i.e. where I am, who I am with, what I am doing, etc; but about 45% of the time I ask him a question he doesn't want to answer.  How did his cousin make it sound?  Like I just called and complained to him that I don't like the way things are going with me and KF and the way he acts isn't fair.  Does that sound like what I said? NO!  Then his ghey excuse??  He didn't know that he wasn't supposed to tell KF!?

Yea, so I decided to solve the problem by not telling his cousin (or anyone else for that matter) anything about my relationship with KF.  No one is really happy.  Everyone thinks that it is gonna end badly.  That may very well be true, but can I at least be happy for now??

Live-In Boyfriend?

This past week, KF stayed with me from Sunday to Friday.  Sunday night he told me that he needed me to come pick him up (he stays about 1.5 hours away).  I said fine...I mean, I can't turn down someone when they say it is important.  It was a very interesting week.  He lived with me basically.  And somehow neither of us really got on each other's nerves.  I have classes on Mondays and Wednesdays and I work from 10pm - 2am Sun-Thurs so he was left to his own devices for a while.  We mainly chilled out, I watched wrestling with him (he loves that mess), and Thursday I took him to an art gallery.  Overall, we had a wonderful time.  He is coming back near the end of this week to stay (for about another week--it's his Spring Break).

Today I realized just how much I need/want  my own space.  I went to wash my hair and realized that my roommate had taken my blow dryer with her to her stupid boy *space* friend's house.  Words cannot describe the anger that I felt at that exact moment.  It upset me even more because earlier today I told her that I was planning to wash my hair and she didn't even mention that she had my damn blow dryer.  And to top it off, when she goes over to Stupid's house she is there for days on end.  So with this coming week being our Spring Break, I don't know when I will see my blow dryer.  She's been gone since Friday night.  I am tired of sharing crap.

The other thing that annoys me is that she barely cleans.  I think she thinks that is okay since she is barely home and that would be okay if it wasn't for the fact that she will be gone for days, come home, mess something up, and then leave again.  I hate feeling like I am doing all the work or cleaning up messes that I didn't make.  I still don't know if I will end up staying here after I graduate or not.  Before we were throwing around the idea of staying together again if we both stayed around here to save on rent and such.  However, I no longer think that is a feasible idea.  Not just because of things that I don't like that she does, but I think 2 years is really enough time to be around someone.

Well, I am starting to doze off....

Interesting Revelations

So me and KF had a threesome like a month ago with this girl AR.  Well lately things with me and KF have been getting pretty interesting.  He told me he is all in like with me among other stuff. = interesting.  

So why did AR tell me today that basically I need to back off because her and KF have "an emotional attachment to each other" and basically she is in love with him??  The kicker?  At the exact moment she was telling me this, I was on the phone with KF telling him what was happening and laughing at her.  However, I felt bad for her.  KF admitted to me that used to tell her that he loved her when they had sex.  ::sigh::  Even though he didn't mean it.  But now, like a man, he is surprised that he took the stuff that he said at face value and is now "trying to mark her territory".  

I did not sign up for this kind of drama.  The other thing I thought was funny about the situation is that me and KF were just talking about not talking to AR anymore.

Just when I thought my life was drama free.......